Thursday, February 26, 2009

Now What???

After my mastectomy I looked forward to the healing and pain free days. I feel like I'm becoming the biggest whiner, but danged if I don't have something else to cry about now.



Today is exactly two weeks since I had surgery. The major pain from surgery is gone, but now what I have is something that I don't know if I can properly describe. I don't feel like I have to go into detail to explain the pain I felt when I had my breasts removed. Everyone probably has a pretty good understanding that that hurt. One thing, though, they warned me all my nerves would be cut and I wouldn't have surface feeling anymore. I've had no feeling on my skin area at all - I mean dead numb - or it was. I am now developing a feeling in parts of that area that make me want to rip my skin off.

There are areas of skin on my chest that are hyper-sensitive. I want nothing touching, feeling, looking, existing near or thinking about that area. I can't find a shirt soft enough to wear. Everything that brushes up against my chest makes me want to jump through the roof. None of the kids' friends are allowed to come inside anymore cause Mommy refuses to wear a shirt most of the time. When I do have one on, I have it pulled away from my chest.

The other night I was sitting on the couch watching TV and sensed Jacob was staring. Finally, he asked why it was that I had my shirt pulled forward in front of me and I was looking down it. I explain that I wasn't really looking down it, I was blowing softly on my skin under my shirt. He asked if that made it feel better. I told him no. So, of course, he wanted to know why I was doing it. I thought long and hard and finally decided I would answer his question with a question - one that only his 7 year old mind would understand: I asked if his homework was done; surely he had better things to do than stand there bothering me with complicated questions.

6 comments:

  1. Sheri,
    I do remember my sister saying that it would feel like she had an itch, but when she would scratch she would get no relief..?? I can't imagine what you go through in a day.. nor can I imagine what your body is going through.. I hope you can find some comfort soon..
    Kelly~

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  2. Sheri, I don't remember having that feeling on my chest. I do remember having an awful time with the numbness under my arm. I mostly wore an oversized flannel shirt. Have you tried that?

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  3. I am so sorry, I pray you find some relief soon!

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  4. Have someone hit up Target for you and purchase some soft camis. I don't wear a bra at all - just my camis.

    Sheri, there's nothing anyone can say to make you feel better but I do remember being at the same point as you. I was on Oxycodone for 6 weeks non stop. It was unbearable pain and I wanted to drop kick everyone who said I was going to get addicted to the drugs.

    Whine, cry, throw dishes if you want and screw anyone who doesn't like it.

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  5. I'm so sorry that you are in such pain. I am praying that it is better soon. It's so not fair.

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  6. I hope you are able to find some type of material that doesn't irritate your skin...I know that has to be miserable....

    Keeping you in my prayers...

    Hugs
    Terri

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